Is he cold?
Is he hot?
Are his clothes too tight?
Is he breathing?
The first night…
A night in the life of any new Mum can be pretty hectic; no sleep, comfort feeds, wind, Colic and always full of anxiety and worry. That first night is all about worry.
However this is about my first night of being a Mum, do not, I repeat, do not mistake this statement for the day Hutch was born, no, no, no! This is the first night we arrived home and I no longer had the warm, safe environment of my hospital room where my endorphins were running wild and I was a loved up hippy.
After coming out of my Endone-induced hospital stay and arriving home I thought we had parenting in the bag. All the midwives at the hospital kept telling me “You are a natural”… “You don’t need us” and this built me up with a severe case of over confidence.
As many Mums will tell you (dads too) that first night home from the hospital is HELL! It’s as if someone took your beautiful bundle of joy and replaced it with the spawn of Satan.
Our first night home Hutch screamed and screamed – nothing we could do would help. I remember saying to my husband “What have we done? Is this what life will be like, now?” It was awful; a mess of bleeding nipples, dirty nappies, Google, Google and more Google!
We took it in turns walking around the bedroom rocking him and rocking him, he would fall asleep and we thought we were superheroes… 30 minutes later and he was screaming again; back on the boob he went and so began my failed attempt at breastfeeding (but more on that later).
About 4:30am we fell asleep, I was sitting up with Hutch on my chest and my husband passed out on the floor, with one arm still rocking an empty bassinet.
The morning came and so did sleep, Hutch slept for the next five hours and all was forgiven, I returned to my loved up, photo-taking state…
Fast forward ten months on and I will never forget that first horrible night and I make sure to warn any expecting mothers that although it feels like it will never end, morning comes and all is forgiven because let’s face it, none of us did this thinking we were going to ever sleep again!